


On a Man and His Penis

by seperis



Category: X-Men (Movieverse)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2001-04-21
Updated: 2001-04-21
Packaged: 2017-10-12 21:46:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,473
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/129412
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seperis/pseuds/seperis
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I really think the title says it all, don't you?</p>
            </blockquote>





	On a Man and His Penis

**Author's Note:**

> Author Notes: Sare Liz owns the universe this belongs to. I just got to imagine this out on AIM while she giggled. This was therapy the other night.  
> Dedication: Ann and Sare Liz for beta and encouragement. Diebin, Beth and Andariel for not immediately asking what institution I was housed in so they could email my psychiatrist.

"So I was thinkin'..." <glances at Marie>

"Again?" <grinning>

"Do you ever stop thinkin' of sex?"

"Is that a trick question?"

"Yeah. I mean, no. Shit. Hands down, baby. Okay. We need to talk."

"Sugar--" <Wheedling.>

"Hands. Down. Listen, I was thinking--"

"Was it hard?" <vague innuendo, groping. Logan's wondering if talk is really necessary>

"I was thinking that we need to--Marie, baby, God...right there--fuck. No." <Pins her down under him while she grins>

<Enter Penis.>

"Still wanna talk?" <shimmying of hips. Penis likes this and shows it.>

"Okay. I was thinking about this for awhile--oh GOD, baby, yes. Lift your--oh yes. Yes. Fuck. Marie, I think you--fuck Marie!" <flips him on his back, giggles> "Shit, baby, can you just listen?"

"Do I need my mouth to listen?" <obvious innuendo while Logan debates Talking Versus Oral Sex. Talking is winning by a bare margin.>

"Look--yeah, baby--I had this idea. That, you know--we--oh yeah. Oh yeah. Yes..." <Logan is close to giving this up. Spits it out.>"What's your choice? Marriage or adoption?"

<At which time, Marie lets penis fall from gaping mouth, much to Logan's dismay, as well as Penis'.>

"ADOPTION OR MARRIAGE?" <Logan glances down at mishandled sexual equipment and really wishes he'd waited until after. Penis twitches sadly.> "Why?"

"Canadian citizenship. Because I want to. Better tax bracket. Fuck, why do you think?" <Still missing oral sex. Marie is too caught up in the idea to notice Penis looks Depressed.>

"Logan, when did this occur to you?"

"For awhile." <looks away>

"We don't need to get married." <thinking, bewildered.> "You wanna adopt me?" <loses sexy thoughts, falls back on bed. Logan is regretful of this. Penis even more so.>

"Well--" <wondering how he managed to get those two ideas in the same sentence as well. In retrospect, seems odd.>

"DAUGHTER? LEGAL DAUGHTER?" <Logan's Penis is pissed as hell he pulled this.>

"That's not the first choice or anything..."

"Like, you want me to scream Daddy when I come now?"

<Penis has lost interest in all proceedings and retreats.>

"I could start wearing little school uniforms, though." <Logan's penis awakens and does a double take on that one. Interest ensues.>

"Baby--"

"That's an awfully appropriate endearment if this is what you want to do, you know? Something you're not telling me about your fantasy life, sugar?" <Logan's penis has to think about that one. So does Logan.>

"No. I mean, listen bab--Marie. Marriage. You and me."

"Hopefully not you and the lawnmower or anything--"

"Do you wanna hear this or not?"

"All ears, sugar."

"Either way, you'd get Canadian citizenship. Okay?"

"You can get me IDs for that."

"Only if you wanna change your identity for good and that's trickier than you think."

"So you woke up one morning and thought--marriage or adoption? I mean--seriously, how DO you put those two together?"

"You're mine."

"We both know that--"

"But other people don't."

"You think I'm gonna wander off with someone else?"

"Never worried about that. They'd be dead before you got two feet away. That's not the point. The point is--"

"Catholic school-girl uniforms would look REALLY good on me and you have one hell of a kinky imagination?"

<Penis enthusiastically bobs at imagery invading Logan's mind.>

"I want to marry you."

"You want me to wear the uniform too?"

<Logan breathes out. Penis understands completely.>

"I'll buy you several."

"Teddy bear underwear?"

<Logan's penis is completely absorbed by the pictures running through Logan's head.>

"God yes."

<Marie leans over him, bracing her hands on his shoulders.>

"You're weird. If you wanted marriage, why not just SAY marriage?"

<Straddling Logan, whose penis is happy now. VERY happy.>

"I mean--you ARE my father figure, you know, sugar?"

<Penis doesn't really mind this.>

"AND my first lover--Jocasta complex and all--" <rubbing carefully, applying pelvic pressure. Penis is enjoying every second.>

"Only lover."

"You got that right."

"Ever."

"Yes."

<Serious grindage, Penis wanting a little more action.>

"So you want me to call you Daddy when I come?"

<heavy breathing--intellectual Logan is wondering what on earth he can do with a question like that--Penis no longer cares as long as Marie is saying some form of his name.>

"Baby--"

"Yeah, Daddy?"

<Logan realizes he has reached a new low point in his morality when that doesn't detract from the sensation of Marie wetness seeping through the slit in her leather pants against his penis. The penis doesn't have morality--it senses it is Close To Heaven.>

"Whatever you want, baby."

<Marie gropes for the convenient box of condoms on the bedside table and puts one between her teeth. Logan breathes out in relief.>

"I'll marry you." <removes foil from condom, slides it between her lips>

"Okay." <Penis no longer cares about citizenship. It senses Oral Sex is ahead.>

"Just you."

"I'll kill anyone else who touches you, baby. I don't share."

<Penis is ecstatic at the feel of Marie and condom. Jumps about in joy. Logan's head realizes that Penis will get control completely and thinks he'd better finish this now before it takes over.>

"Marie--"

<Random sounds from both when Marie swallows once. Penis realizes Logan may have plans of some sort that interfere with Marie's mouth. This is Not Good.>

"Baby--"

<Penis gets nervous when Marie begins to lift head away.>

"Marie, baby--"

"Yeah, sugar?" <Penis panics, jerking slightly now that warmth is gone. Before it can take control, Logan rolls Marie on her back and places penis in less satisfactory, but at least warm and damp area between Marie's legs. Penis thinks this COULD lead to Good Things if Logan stops talking>

"I love you, Marie. I won't share you. I want to be everything to you."

<Marie runs bare hands through Logan's hair.>

"You are, sugar."

<Penis, seeing opportunity, makes its move. Pushes inward--Logan helps, to Penis's surprise and delight.>

"Everything, Marie. Whatever you need. Whoever you need." <Penis is all the way in and it is GOOD. Is very happy. Twitches at the clamp of muscles around it.>

"Logan--"

"Just this, just us, no one else." <Pulls out, but Penis understands that the fun stuff is about to start.>

"Won't share you. Won't leave you. Won't let you leave. Ever." <Penis is happily enjoying the dark/bright phenomenon as seen through the latex and Marie's muscles clamp with everything Logan says>

"Logan--" <Moaning. Penis thinks Marie is enjoying this too.>

"Mine, baby. Just me." <Penis notes the best thrusting occurs when Logan is talking and hopes it continues>

"Yes, sugar--"

"Your father, your lover, your best friend, everything. You're mine, mine only."

"Yessss--"

<Penis notices the thrusts are speeding up quickly and takes in the comfortable twitch of interior muscles>

"Say it, baby. Say it."

<Penis knows Good Things are coming. Very Good Things. Friction increase, change in angle, and Logan's locked his hands around Marie's wrists below him. This is good. Good Things are Happening Very Soon. Penis begins to twitch in anticipation.>

"Logan--"

"Say it. You're mine."

"Please sugar." <Penis thinks Marie may agree that she's green at this point if Logan says so. Inner muscles are getting VERY tight, yes sir, and this is Good.>

"Marie, say it. Say it to me."

"Sugar--Oh GOD, Logan, yes, please, yes, yours, only yours--Oh GOD!"

<Great Things are happening! Penis notes tightening of inner muscles, then the rhythmic squeezing that accompanies the Great Thing! Logan growls and starts moving even more quickly, delighting Penis.>

"That's it baby, come for me, just for me--"

"Logan, yes, baby. Please, more--"

<Tightening becoming vaguely rhythmic, Penis KNOWS something is happening, something Great>

"GOD, sugar, Logan, baby, please, just a little--YES! LOGAN!"

<Penis feels sudden contractions, feels the Great Thing coming, coming faster with every dark/light change, know--YES the Great Thing has arrived! Surrenders into it happily surrounded by warm convulsions and collapses in exhaustion, perfectly happy with the entire world, and especially Marie for having such a lovely place to play.>

"That was--"

"Yeah." <Panting.> "I love you, Marie."

"I know."

"We'll get married tomorrow."

"Whatever you want, however you want it, sugar. Now, do you want me on my knees or not?"

<Penis, who really did think it was exhausted, wakes up in interest as it leaves the warm place and reenters the world. Not so warm. Damn.>

"Put on a skirt."

"With tights?"

"No bra."

"Cotton underwear?" <Marie smiling, getting up, stripping off the leather. Penis is intensely interested,>

"Yeah." <Logan in the Sex Zone. Penis knows this will be a Many Great Things Night.>

<Marie comes back properly attired. Crawls on bed, kneels over Logan. Grins.>

"No one else, baby. Ever."

"Show me, sugar."

<Penis KNOWS this will be the best night of its life.>

The End.


End file.
